Do Inorganic Orgasms Matter?

During a much heated drunken argument with my friend-philosopher-guide aka my drinking buddy, we discovered that like web traffic metrics, our sex lives need some monitoring.

Image Courtesy: Google

Since the international female orgasm day was just 2 days ago on August 8, the focus of the conversation was centered largely around the lack of orgasms for the vast majority of Indian women including Jashodaben. Jashodaben who? The spouse of our much in news, PM Modi, with the famed 56-inch chest.

The 64-year-old woman who lives a very simple life in a remote village in her native Gujrat, must never ever had an orgasm. She was married off to Narendra Modi when she was 16 and stayed with her husband all of 3 months. Now it is theoretically possible to achieve at least 1 orgasm in these 3 months, given that both husband and wife were at the raging hormonal teen phase (she was 16 & he was 18), at the time of marriage. But both parties have refuted any physical contact with each other.

While the honorable PM found his g-spot in politics, the poor Jashodaben immersed herself in teaching young kids at a primary school. Till date, she has not been with any other man and has even given up eating rice for 40 years! How does giving up rice, help, is something I don’t want to get into.  Meanwhile our PM is neither giving her a divorce nor an orgasm.

Like the majority of women who are reluctant to use self-help to get to the big O, Jashodaben wouldn’t have explored this inorganic way either.

If you plot a graph of orgasms achieved organically or inorganically, most data would lean towards inorganic just like the viral videos of today. There is a whole economy resting on supplying tools (literally) to aid this inorganic big O.  When SMM experts go gaga over engagement and time spent, imagine the predicament of the female population trying to keep tabs on number of followers & likes while boosting its reach.  

Image Courtesy: Google

Unfortunately, just like brands who insist on organic growth, our culture favors organic orgasms only. Which is why in almost all condom related surveys, “Just 48 per cent of us said that they usually orgasm” and “Globally, twice as many men (64 per cent) as women regularly have orgasms” don’t take into account all the big O’s achieved without a partner.

As the startup whiz kids find newer ways to give a collective hard on to college drop outs & IITians, the empowered women in India are leaning more to self-induced joys of ecstasy. It is to be seen if these methods sustain or the good ol’ organic way triumphs. Meanwhile, the hope that Jashodaben eats a bowl of rice, will continue to drive this author to track her agonies over her ecstasies.