During a much heated drunken argument with my friend-philosopher-guide
aka my drinking buddy, we discovered that like web traffic metrics, our sex
lives need some monitoring.
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| Image Courtesy: Google |
Since the international female orgasm day was just 2 days
ago on August 8, the focus of the conversation was centered largely around the lack
of orgasms for the vast majority of Indian women including Jashodaben. Jashodaben who? The spouse of our much
in news, PM Modi, with the famed 56-inch chest.
The 64-year-old woman who lives a very simple life in a
remote village in her native Gujrat, must never ever had an orgasm. She was
married off to Narendra Modi when she was 16 and stayed with her husband all of
3 months. Now it is theoretically possible to achieve at least 1 orgasm in
these 3 months, given that both husband and wife were at the raging hormonal
teen phase (she was 16 & he was 18), at the time of marriage. But both
parties have refuted any physical contact with each other.
While the honorable PM found his g-spot in politics, the
poor Jashodaben immersed herself in teaching young kids at a primary school.
Till date, she has not been with any other man and has even given up eating
rice for 40 years! How does giving up rice, help, is something I don’t want to
get into. Meanwhile our PM is neither
giving her a divorce nor an orgasm.
Like the majority of women who are reluctant to use self-help
to get to the big O, Jashodaben wouldn’t have explored this inorganic way
either.
If you plot a graph of orgasms achieved organically or
inorganically, most data would lean towards inorganic just like the viral
videos of today. There is a whole economy resting on supplying tools (literally)
to aid this inorganic big O. When SMM
experts go gaga over engagement and time spent, imagine the predicament of the
female population trying to keep tabs on number of followers & likes while
boosting its reach.
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| Image Courtesy: Google |
Unfortunately, just like brands who insist on organic
growth, our culture favors organic orgasms only. Which is why in almost all
condom related surveys, “Just 48 per cent of us said that they usually orgasm” and
“Globally, twice as many men (64 per cent) as women regularly have orgasms” don’t
take into account all the big O’s achieved without a partner.
As the startup whiz kids find newer ways to give a
collective hard on to college drop outs & IITians, the empowered women in
India are leaning more to self-induced joys of ecstasy. It is to be seen if
these methods sustain or the good ol’ organic way triumphs. Meanwhile, the hope
that Jashodaben eats a bowl of rice, will continue to drive this author to
track her agonies over her ecstasies.
