Baby Pratyasha is an Angel!

Look Ma, I even have wings, not the fake wings that the teachers used to put on us for school concerts…but real ones, which can flap… I even got a wand… only it does no magic like Harry Potters, but every time I move it around, tiny stars fall around it like a trail. I have a lovely white dress that never gets dirty even if I roll around on the ground…but then there is no ground! We are on some kind of fluffy, snowy surface, like clouds.

But Ma, the best part is that there is no homework… I don’t have to bother about class tests and exams. But there was this wrinkled lady who reminded me of our geography teacher who showed me my patch of the cloud, she looked very strict. I guess even here there are some rules and regulations.

The rules are not many, just that I have to keep smiling the whole day…now c’mon that’s not at all difficult… when I realize that I don’t have to sit for any board exams or compete with my own friends and random strangers to get into college, vie with girls to get a guy, struggle to get to work in the increasing traffic, manage to squeeze in a little time for you in my increasingly hectic adult life… I rather be here and smile away to glory.

Although, I will miss going to school and meeting my friends and playing hopscotch with them (yeah I know we never played that… we have moved on to video games and stuff…but it’s nice sentimental stuff).

But the best part is that, I can get to watch you as you go about your work…I can see you as you fold my arms over my chest…I can see the love that you had for me… I can see how tired you are, I can see how you need some rest…I think its best that God decided to get me here… at least you will get some rest.

Get some sleep Ma; go on take a nap while you are waiting for the flight. I will watch over you like you have done countless times, I will not let anyone disturb you. And I will always be smiling … for you, forever.

Smile and wave …smile and wave…smile and wave…hey stars fall out of my hands when I wave… this is so cool… do they fall out of my feet when I walk… but hey, I don’t have to move my legs to walk….i’m actually gliding across…ma, look I can glide… ma, look….

Single on V-Day??

Guy 1: Hey, wassup, how are you these days?? Long time no see, eh…how about catching up one of these days?

Me: Hmmm, nice of you to call… but I’m kinda busy…maybe later… (Thinking…strange how I got this call after so long…oh its V-day tomo…no wonder… booty call)

Guy 2: Hey babes…how about a movie tomo??

Me: Sounds nice, which one?

Guy 2: You choose, we’ll pick up the DVD, snuggle in with a beer, what say?

Me: Ok, I’ll call you back; Mom’s on the other line … (wow that was quite direct)

Girl 1: Hey babes, you know what tomo is… so my guy has planned this nice romantic thing for me, but his cousin is visiting from out of town, so why don’t you two hang out so that I get some alone time with my guy?

Me: what, you really think I would…

Girl 1: why not, you are single, doing nothing on V-day and this cousin is not bad, works in an IT company, earns decent…good talker… what’s the problem??

Problem??? The problem is that I don’t want to… why is it difficult to accept that there can be people who can be all by themselves and still have loads of fun. One doesn’t have to be with someone to experience the meaning of life.

Besides, I think its more about not being projected as a loner which makes people scramble for their phonebooks and call up long lost forgotten crushes expecting something magical to happen. Wake up, its not a movie, if the person hasnt responded earlier, few chances are that s/he would now.

And frankly speaking, coming from a small town where there were few hallmarked card shops, figuring out that Valentine’s Day even existed was only for those whose I.Q was more than 180. Besides, seeing my friends getting pink teddy bears, roses, was not my idea of fun… I mean what’s with the teddy bears… I don’t like them… would never have one in my room… coz they never stop S-T-A-R-I-N-G. Besides I am not a nature person… that means I don’t go about harping on global warming to all and sundry or planting trees, I do my bit for nature by not picking flowers or accepting them …especially red roses… now if they are orchids, it’s another story, Likewise for chocolates.

But why do I have to give up my space and share of the bed for these things, I can easily buy them myself… I didn’t diligently avoid the mush to get into it later… yes sir, I chose to avoid the mush… like some people choose to be constantly be in one relationship after the other.

Does that mean that I am a loser… if I don’t have any special plans on the super hyped V-day? Of course I would like to be fussed over and made to feel special, but if that happens only on one particular day of the year, then I rather depend on myself to fuss over.

How about you fussing over someone else for a change… it’s not always about taking, sometimes it’s good to give too… quips in a smart ass sorry excuse for a friend (read sam)… well yes I would like to fuss over somebody once in a while… but I would rather fuss over myself… there I said it… I want to fuss over myself rather than somebody else, as I can handle my own expectations better rather than somebody else expectation … which mostly runs like this…

• don’t look at another man,
• don’t think about another man,
• don’t think, period
• always look like you are dressed up for the kill even when you are actually nursing a bad cold and 102 degrees fever,
• be nice to his parents,
• don’t be a bitch to his exes’,
• be a buddy to his friends,
• play the perfect host to his boss,
• love sports,
• Put up with his burps and farts…
• Be a good chef, but accept that you are 2^nd to his mom’s cooking
• Always clean up after him
• Never nag about hygiene

Well, I rather be with myself thank you. It’s much simpler that ways, no one, no expectations, no blowing up hard earned money on pink teddies, no getting hurt later and no picking up the pieces, no moving on.

The three E’s of a relationship - Experience, Experiment, and Expectation (thanks to remo) always lead to the 4^th E… “EX”.

Just that I miss all the great offers and discounts that stores these days offer…maybe the new marketing trend will be a single day!!

Only 1493 Tigers left… Save the man!

The ad says Only 1493 Tigers left… save the tiger… but I say there are only 1129 Men left… who is going to save them?
What only 1129 Men…aren’t we a one billion plus country…well yeah…but where are the men?
The dozen that I know don’t constitute a man…. 7 percent are automations….they are programmed to get up and go to work and then party after work. No No, it’s not a new age phenomenon… this robotization of man… you can see it all the way through their lives. They were wired to be automations right from their birth…they went to school, college, professional college, work, marriage, kids, etc like clockwork… it was as if their meter was on since the time they were born.
Many don’t even question the purpose of being in this rat race… they are busy making investment plans for the future, not realizing that the future that they are seeking will always lie …well in the future.
Who will save the man?

Patriotism, Where art Thou??

60 years of the republic….and we get a new version of a music video to show… that was one of the major stories of the nation’s foremost newspaper.
Republic day has always been special for me… as a small town schoolgirl….the day always started with the whole family glued to the television set…watching the parade being telecast live from New Delhi where the president takes the salute.
The ultimate aim for me in those days…to be part of the parade and win bravery awards, from the hands of the President, the highest authority in our country. Many days were spent in scheming how to put my elder sister in life threatening situations so that I could come and save her and win the coveted award. But these were only day dreams fuelled by overzealous empty mind.
Our hometown also had a mini parade on the republic day, where various schools would participate and march past the chief minister (oh the joys of democracy…if not the President, I had the humble CM)…winning the best platoon for the school was a good enough high… nothing made me happier or prouder than carrying the trophy back to the school, flaunting it all along on the way, teasing the rival schools with it.
That competitiveness has not surfaced since those school times again.
When I got a chance to move out from my parent’s home and stayed in Delhi… among my to-do lists was to see the Republic day parade in person at the India gate itself…alas, four years in Delhi and the only trip to India gate was for Ice-cream after late night parties. When I did express a desire to go watch the parade, my new found big city friends, made so much fun of my small town aspirations, that I completely dropped the idea of patriotism leave alone the parade. Besides, where was the time?? I had to earn my daily bread…make a mark in my career, that was how I was going to do my bit for the country, not by watching some silly parade… grow up girl, I said to myself and glugged down another drink to celebrate the republic day with my colleagues.
Half a decade later, in another new city, exploring my own independence, I came to the conclusion, that it is idle chatter for bored housewives and retired government officials… no one bothers about the parade which still is celebrated with as much pomp and show as it was some 25 years ago…many kids don’t even care about it… they are more interested in their PSP, WII or any such abbreviations.
But then these are the same kids, who will gladly raise awareness through their posts on twitter and facebook, and light thousands of candles for some cause or the other. Can I blame them then that they don’t know a Kuchipudi from a Khathakali …since the Republic day parade among other things did improve the general knowledge of us kids by telling us about the various traditions and customs of the other states… by making us sing the same sur in all our songs?
I watched the parade on TV after a long time and still had goosebumps for some reason… even though I knew that this is just another celebration for India… it will go back to its mudslinging and fighting in the parliament… it will go back to its defense land scams … or some new controversy with Mr. Babble mouth on twitter…the tableaux will be discarded… the children thanked and handed over a certificate of participation which will gather dust somewhere… the President shaking her white overcoat and finally getting the joke that the Korean guest had said… things will become normal… after the showcase of patriotism, things will be back to being the same.
But why the goosebumps??
Maybe because 60 years of the republic and half of that spent in my cynicism… still the nation has not done that bad …the ways to express it may have changed… but like religion, patriotism is best expressed individually.
P.S – I always wanted to know if there is any prize for the thousands of audience who come to watch the Republic day parade at India Gate… braving the Delhi Winter, early in the morning, with 6 inches of makeup…who are these people… nobody I know has ever been to such a shindig…who are these people… can we start a fund for them…the real patriots??

I was rejected

For the first time, I felt very humbled in my life… and all for a few kilos….I had just been thinking that I need to lose all that flab from my midriff… and while I am at it, maybe work on my upper arms …few inches less would be nice….but the attendant killed my self-image… no not just killed, but twisted the knife also.
I had thought that I was invincible …what with my never say die attitude and positive outlook and staunch faith in the adage that “karm kar phal ka asha mat rakh”…so then how did I get rejected… I am the perfect modern day single independent woman…who has the world at her feet…how dare he reject me??
All I wanted was to go and do my two-bit for this kid who was battling blood cancer… she needed blood… blood I had… am human ....not an avatar….but apparently not…my blood was not good enough.
I never felt so humbled in my life… it was as if God was saying… “Smruti, you have been taking things for granted… especially your life… you have had it easy… now is the time to pull up your socks… let this be a warning”.
And I really am a bit scared… what if my other friends and colleagues were like me…then the poor kid would have not gotten her doze of O+ve, just because we modern day independent people like our daily tipple… luckily it was not an emergency situation…. Luckily my friends are not as cocky and stupid as me.
That’s it, I have decided, I will try and lead a much healthier life…will exercise not to lose the flab, but to increase my stamina and will try and kick my other bad habits.
Thank you, Anu, Mariam, Unni, Ankush, Vatsala, Priya, Sidharth and Radhika for coming to my rescue…and thank you God for sending that attendant to save my life.