Saturday, August 16, 2014

Jumping on the little yellow cloud

Every time the cloud touches me and melts against my skin, it leaves a tiny glittering film. And it feels so cool. Each drop of water is absorbed and thousand small glittering droplets rush in to fill the chasm.

And what is that loud thumping noise? And that whooshing sound? Where is that coming from? Need to investigate. But first, let me feel this cloud against my skin a bit longer. It’s not exactly like a snowflake, but so much lighter.  

I turn to look at you, see the joy in your eyes and nod. And I grip your hands a little harder. I can feel the blood rushing through your veins. It’s hot. And fast. The thumping noise is louder now.

The clouds below our feet have now completely melted away. We are dangling our feet over …nothing. Then the lumps of clouds on our sides also give away and we fall. Fly. Into nothingness.

I turn to look at you, into your eyes and see joy. Perhaps it mirrors mine. We land onto something soft. And immediately I feel the cool melting cloud on my skin. I look up and see a doughnut shaped cloud above us. The hole through which we fell so tiny, that I wonder how insignificant we are. I want to reach up and touch the tuft of cloud, feel it against my fingers. But I don’t want to let go of your hand. I don’t want you to fall away from me. I want us to fall together. I want to see the joy in your eyes as we fall. Fly. Into nothingness.

And that’s when you pull me towards you. So that we are facing each other. Looking at each other. Holding hands. The whooshing sound is now less but the thumping has settled into a steady pattern. I realize that it’s our heartbeats, complimenting one thump after the other. For some reason, it feels reassuring and I close my eyes. And instantly, I feel a myriad of sensations that is so powerful that I open my eyes as soon as I close them. The cool melting of clouds, the hot rush of the blood on your hands, the slow thump of our hearts all combine to give a heady rush no chemical can ever produce. Each cell of my body is tuned into yours. The mitochondria, nucleus and Golgi apparatus trying to spill out of the cell membrane and merge with yours. Never has biology been so sexed up.

I muster up the courage to close my eyes again. To feel the sensations that so overwhelm me. And they rush in as expected and I feel my hands losing their grip over yours. And I feel you slipping away. I don’t want to let you go. We were supposed to fall through the clouds together. But I can’t do anything. I can’t open my eyes. I am overpowered by these sensations. I want to open my eyes. I want to be overpowered by these sensations. I want to hold your hand. I want to feel the cloud melt against my bare hands. I want to feel the rush of your hot blood against my skin.

I want to fall through the clouds. That little yellow cloud. With you.