30 year old kisses 18 year old

It was my friend bday and she was a bit depressed that she was turning 30 (I had been through the same feeling few months ago... so I could totally empathise with her), so we decided to spice things up for her ... we were at our regular watering hole and generally being the usual boisterous group owning to the fact that we were regulars there and all the waiters and managers were bullied into the celebrations, when somebody (I gladly take credit here) came up with this brilliant idea that the bday girl kisses the 3rd man that walks in the door.

So, with bated breath we waited and counted and we were really expecting a Johnny Bravo kind of dude to walk in... while bday girl was hoping that we all drop dead for coming up with this ridiculous idea (secretly hoping that the 3rd man be a really Cool Knight in Shinning Armour to walk in with complete fanfare) wheras the bday girls soulmate had already started flexing his muscles in an attempt to beat up the 3rd guy in any category.

Lo and Behold, Man 1 enters and is rejected by the sheer coincidence of numerical first, Man 2 is the 2nd best of the first variable and then enter a bevy of giggly girls... and our heartbeats have gone up a beat higher than F1 final leg... and enters Man 3....yooohooo.... but wait a min... it turns out to be an eighteen year old boy and like true protectors of the regular patron (read bday girl), the waiters and managers swoop in and surround the boy and start frisking him for his ID proof...coz people above 21 are only allowed... we waiting on the sides like bloodhounds also do our bit by screaming "You Boy... You Boy ...over here ...hurry... over here)...poor boy is all nervous, what with hysterical women screaming all over him and waiters and bouncers baying for his blood aka his ID....

In the midst of all this, the soul mate had a change of heart and propostioned the hapless boy for the bday girl... the poor boy didnt know what to do with this blatant demand, all the while trying to look cool since...then his girlfriend decided to step in and save his day (like all GF's do) and gave him "permision"... the boy timidly stepped up looking expectantly at the sword (read kiss) hanging over his neck (read lips) admist the whole gang cheering him on... imagine his horror when the bday girl equally timid gets up and plants a friendly peck on his cheeks... he almost fainted from the whole pressure of expecting a bazooka and being confounded with a pin dart!

The ordeal over, the hapless guy walks over to his table where his girlfriend is beaming at his feat like an indulgent mother, the waiters and bouncers are cheering that everything passed off smoothly and there was no bar fight, having forgotten to check his real age...the bday girls friends all looking disgusted at the letdown of not seeing tongues in action (they had themselves puckered up their lips anticipating the kiss), and the soul mate suddenly at a loss not knowing whether he did the right thing or not, the guinea pig boy relived that his intergity was not violated and he was safe from the clutches of the bouncers and the bday girl happy that the 30th bday had a great start!

It was a bit of fizzle that no newspapers/news channels which covered this very important event of the newly turned 30 year old... no headline which read "30 year old kisses 18 year old in a watering hole"...but what the hell, we all felt important being part of this historic event ... imagine what a story to tell the grandkids!

Well like Shakespeare said -- "All's Well that Ends Well"

MySpace

Finally I am on My Space... no no ... not the networking site, but My Space literally... I moved from my PG digs to a rented apartment which I can call my own...since I am the only person stayin there... nobody else... Its me and meri tanhai...

So let me describe the new place for once and for all... Its a small cozy place with a small bedroom and a living room and kitchen together... of course there is a bathroom attached to the bedroom --- and thats it... thats the end of my well... now I can happily sit in my well and croak away to glory.

So my day begins by waking up and realizing that I can hog the newspaper, dont have to make breakfast according to somebody else's taste buds... since this is a great start to the day, the rest of the day passes equally brilliant.

So, here's to MySpace...where I can pretend to be Superman, Charlies Angels (all 3), Jamie Oliver, Jackie Chan, Ellen Degeneres, Chandler, Monica (more often) while cooking, cleaning and enjoy this new found independence!

Do Miracles Happen??

Please say they do...coz I desperately need one right now.... I left my handycam in the cab... now all God needs to do is ensure that the cabbie sees it, overcomes the lure of easy money and notices his golden heart and comes back to return it. Can something like this happen??

Well, I don't know... all I can do is kick myself and believe that miracles happen...

But how conditional is my love for God... I will start believing in miracles if and only if my handycam finds its way back to me somehow, but if I dont get my handycam back, then I will turn a cynical eye to all the mysterious ways of God.

Why are we so conditional... why are we so attached to materialistic things... I don't remember feeling so miserable when my cousin bro passed away 5 days ago, at a very young age. How come a piece of engineered goods means more than a human life, how come miracles start making sense only when we lose any other hope of logic?

I have no answers yet... but now I do know that I am as conditional and materialistic as the next person... its a double blow to me... first the loss, second the realization.

Well, the good thing is that all these philosophical musings may take my mind off the loss.

However, if anyone finds a sony handycam with 2 GB memory stick (newly bought - thats why I was carrying the bloody camera in an amchi mumbai cab) in a black travel bag with a chance that my visiting card inside, please do return it back.

God....I do believe in you... I always have ... and I do believe in miracles as well...

Legally Gay???

First they tell us that we need a certificate to be with the person we love (marriage), then they tell us that the person needs to be from the opposite sex...now they are telling us that it maybe ok if the person is from the same sex... well hang on ...Why do I need a rationing of love... of self-expression?

Detractors (read religious groups) are arguing that it is not natural... it is against God's will... well how the hell do they know what God's will is??

Adam and Eve committed a crime in the garden of Eden... it was a sin... for which humans are still paying... isnt this what we have been taught... well now I realize what the sin was... they made out with the opposite sex... they were meant to wait for the same sex person .... homosexuality was the order of the day!... same sex conjugality was a complete NO NO... thats why we were told that Adam and Eve committed the biggest Sin... but now with evolution, world politics, 6-packs, size zero, global warming, reality shows, Neverland, cloning, nanos, facebooking we have forgotten the original sin and replaced it with being Gay.

Woman Boss

I was watching TV and came across this show called "Na aana iss desh mein Lado"... I don't know much about the storyline but I do know that its about the atrocities on the girl child. But what stuck me most as I surfed through the channel was that the main protagonist was a woman who was shown to be tough and had everyone at her beck and call... My question is how did she reach that position?? Why do people listen to her?? Why does she have so much power??

Then I realized that she was portrayed as this evil, heartless person... that's why she had the power... In popular media a Woman Boss is always portrayed as a heartless bitch (The Devil Wears Prada) and or a great soul who can never do any wrong (Mother India, Jassi Jaise Koi Nahin, Nirupa Roy as the eternal mother)...there are hardly any shades of grey for a woman...

Why So?

Why is it that to have power, people have to become hard-hearted, why cant normal people have any power? Is it bcoz to reach that level, one has to let go off emotions, be detached, be ruthless... have to play the game by its rules...as no new rules are allowed? Don' they ever let their hair down, make mistakes?

Why is it so tough for people to accept that a woman can be friendly, patient, demanding, understanding, supportive, tough, aggressive, no nonsense, flirty, charming, bitchy at the same time...all the qualities of a good boss.

Why is that when we see a woman who has reached the top- we have only 2 expressions..."Wow, she is hot...must have done the boss and all the people on the board" or "She is a bitch". As a woman who is single and is a boss... it is even worse... character assassination apart, she has to fend off unwarranted stares, jibes, and passes.

As a woman who has had led a team, I have had my share of insubordination, I had to work doubly hard and prove myself over and again to each new member to win their support, I've had to use foul language, guzzle copious amount of alcohol, work more than 14 hrs to be one of the boys and only then was I accepted as a boss. But everyone waited with bated breath for that one mistake to pounce on me so that they could say "I told you so, all fluff...no results"

Sometimes, they did get their chance.